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Pondering the Future

The last few months have been pretty tough personally. The loss of my grandfather really put things into a completely different perspective for me. My son also had a medical issue that we feared could be something serious, but luckily turned out to be something very simple.

But those two things have made me really step back and analyze my priorities.

When I first started this blog back in 2008, I had no idea where it would take me. I had no idea how much time I would end up putting into this blog. Of course that was before I had two children and I had all the time in the world to do what I wanted when I wanted to. Now I’m in a completely different life situation. My only “me” time usually comes after the kids have gone down for the evening. I find myself having to decide if I want to read or watch TV. The blog never even crosses my mind. And I’m ashamed to admit how often TV wins out over reading.

I knew things were not looking good for the state of my blog when I started getting serious about keeping a book journal on paper rather than turning on the computer to blog my thoughts. Every time I would sit down to write a book review I realized that my words were empty; they were generic from the previous review. I mean how many ways can I gush about a book? It feels so repetitive to me.

I thought maybe I would “rebrand” myself, incorporate more personal stuff to fill in the gaps that my lack of reading was leaving. But I couldn’t even make myself do that. I’m a pretty private person, and my husband really hates me putting so much out there for the world to see, so sharing personal stuff has always been a challenge.

This is not an easy post for me to write. I think this is harder to write than my first post was. Because I don’t know what I’m wanting to do. I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t know what the future holds.

But I know that right now this blog is not a priority in my life. I feel a true disservice to my readers. I haven’t had any quality material in a very long time.

I suppose I’ll pop in from time to time when the mood strikes, but nothing regular anymore. And I’ll still be around on social media and I’ll still be reading other blogs. I’m not disappearing completely into outer space 🙂

Maybe someday my blogging mojo will return. Perhaps a few months “off” will jumpstart things back up for me … but for now I have to leave this with a “see ya later.”